Can't Let You Go
by Aria Br
Summary: Team Natsu took a mission. It's seems pretty-easy mission for the Fairy Tail's Strongest Team. But something happened on mission. Something that will change Gray forever. Check it out. One-shot. If you don't like the pairing, you better keep out from this story.


_**Thank you to EmLights for beta-ing my one-shot. (Lots of thank you!)**_

_**Fairy Tail © Hiro Mashima**_

_**Well as you see, this is angst. GrayLu. I warned you already.**_

_**As for the cover, I asked him/her already in DeviantArt. S/he said yes. I edited it a little. But I forget Her/his name, so what I gonna say is, the cover is not mine. If it's you, contact my deviantart myst29 to confirm your pen name :)**_

_**I fixed this a little after published it.**_

_**Nothing Happened © Jung Yeop**_

_**Can't let you go ©Seo Young Eun**_

_**The words are all messed up.**_

_**Can't let you go**_

_**Jellal**_

_**Enjoy.**_

* * *

_Tears are slowly streaming down my face_

_I tried to swap and wipe it many times_

_Though I can erase, though I can forget_

_I always cried thinking about spending my days without you_

* * *

He stood there, his black hair cascading into his watery eyes. His hands clenched in fists and his knuckles white, yet his expression was hard to read. The rain poured, as if the world knew his heart was crying.

He didn't care. He didn't care even if the rain made his boxers drenched. He didn't care if the rain washed the tears—that were finally trailing down his cheeks—away.

In his arms, laid a beautiful girl. Her eyes were closed peacefully, and she was smiling. Blood was streaming out of the wound in her chest. Even though it looked like she was sleeping, the tears were visible from her eyes. Her lovely brown eyes were closed. Her expression was painful even though she was smiling.

Lucy Heartfilia.

Lying in his arms, she had been struggling before due to the intense pain. But now, even though she was hurt both mentally and physically, she was at peace.

Before all of this occurred, Team Natsu, consisting of Natsu Dragneel, Lucy Heartfilia, Gray Fullbuster, Erza Scarlet, Wendy Marvell and the exceeds, was heading to a dangerous mission. The mission was to search for a golden clover on the top of a snow mountain filled with deadly cold winds and beastly creatures. Gray, who really needed something to entertain himself, had signed up for the job and offered his team to join him. He had tried to exclude Natsu obviously.

Lucy protested, but Natsu dragged her along anyways. They didn't expect that some of the S-Class mages from the dark guild Tartaros would be there. Gray couldn't handle the strong mage that became his opponent—the guy attacked with lightning and fire, and Gray's ice shield couldn't hold it. His mind went blank as his shield started to fall. Lucy came out of nowhere and jumped right in front of him, saving him from the attack. As a result, the lighting hit her straight in the chest. Gray, after coming out of his shock, tried to pull her back out of the way; he was too late. Gray screamed and clung to Lucy, exposing himself to his opponent without a care.

_Erza jumped to shield Gray. "Gray! Move you dumb-bastard! Instead of crying like that, use this time to finish off these guys! You just wasted Lucy's effort!" Erza yelled into his ear, but Gray just couldn't move._

_The pink haired mage cursed. "Move your ass Gray! Lucy is hurt! Loke must have disappeared or something—"_

_"Loke-san was running out of energy. One of the guys apparently studied spirits and knew how to kill them, so he used that knowledge to defeat Loke-san. Luckily he survived, but he has to spend some time in the spirit world recuperating," Wendy stated. "Hand Lucy-san over here, Gray-san!"_

_Gray ran as fast as he could to reach Wendy. Please. Let me at least reach Wendy. Let Wendy be able to save her. Why was he so stupid that he let a girl, this girl, sacrifice herself for him? Why, Gray, Why? That question kept repeating in his mind. For the first time in his life, Gray Fullbuster felt his arms go cold. The arms where Lucy finally went limp and lost consciousness._

_"Wendy, Please save her. Please—"_

_The sky dragon slayer bit her lower lip. "I'm not sure, I—I'll try." Wendy closed her eyes and let her magic flow through the bleeding girl in front of her. After a few moments, the light of her magic faded._

_"I'm sorry, she's too far gone. My magic can't help…" Wendy started crying hysterically. She felt so useless for not being able to do anything for her friend._

_Natsu turned and screamed at their opponents, "WHAT THE HELL! YOU BASTARDS! WHY ARE YOU ATTACKING US?"_

_The red haired girl realized something. "The clover," she murmured under her breath. "Maybe that's what they are after. It might help." She took a few steps toward the Tartaros guys._

_"WE'LL HAND YOU THE CLOVER, IF YOU LEAVE US ALONE. WE WON'T EVEN SPEAK OF THIS ENCOUNTER TO THE COUNCIL. JUST—Please," Erza pleaded, tears stinging her eyes. "Please. Help us save our friend. Lucy. We can't fight any more." Erza flung the clover to the closest guy._

_Their leader, the one who had caught the clover, stared at Erza uncertainly. He seemed unsure, but finally he nodded and ordered his friends to retreat. They were only after the clover after all. "I will hold you to your promise, Titania."_

_As the Tartaros mages left, they all remained silent except for Gray, who was crying uncontrollably and continuously calling out her name. His screaming "Lucy! Lucy!" echoed throughout the mountain._

_"We have to get her to the nearest town." Erza finally said bitterly. "Come on, Gray. I'll hold h—"_

_"No," Gray refused firmly, "I'll hold her. Don't you dare try to get Lucy away from me, Erza."_

_Natsu's eyes flickered dangerously. "Don't say that to Erza! And you Gray! This is all your fault! You hurt her! You—"_

_The requip mage tapped Natsu's shoulder. He turned his head around, looking at Erza who was glaring fiercely at him and shaking her head._

_"From medical point of view, she's dead," a girl that wore a rounded glasses, told the Fairy Tail's strongest team morosely. They had made it as fast as they could to the clinic in the nearest town and were hoping for the best. "I can't do anything to help, I'm sorry. There are several damaged that I couldn't heal, even though I possess the best medical equipment available. I'm sorry for your lost," she bowed._

_The Fairy Tail's strongest team stood in shock after the announcement about their friend. Especially Gray. Staring at Lucy, who was bathed by blood, caused his heart to ache. He reached with a trembling hand and touched her gently on her cheek._

_"Lucy…" he whispered, and he picked her up bridal style from the emergency table to carry her out of the clinic. The rest of the team didn't follow Gray out, they were too in shock to move. Natsu started to say something when Erza gave him a solid glare. But Natsu was angry. He was so angry he could beat Gray until he died._

_Natsu yelled, "It's all your fault ice-stripper! You couldn't defend yourself so Lucy had to save your freaking life! This is all your fault!"_

_Titania break in, "Natsu. It's not anyone's fault."_

_The fire dragon slayer just couldn't accept that. "Erza! Are you crazy?!"_

_She glared at Natsu. "Be quiet. We are all in grief. It's not only you. Pay attention to Wendy, Charlie, Happy, Gray, and myself. We are all incredibly sad about this. Stop acting like you're the only one who cares about Lucy, Natsu!"_

_Natsu was quiet after that. Wendy was sobbing and blaming herself exactly like Gray did._

_"If only…If only I can have saved Lucy-san's life…" she sobbed. No one ever thought that it would end up like this._

* * *

_Calling out your name alone_

_Like a fool, just like a fool_

* * *

As Gray walked with Lucy in his arms, tears silently flowed down his cheeks. The only time he had ever cried like this was when his parents died. Looking at Lucy's calm peaceful face caused his heart to ache even more. He wondered if this ache appeared because Lucy was his friend and protected him—or something more.

He recalled all his memories with the blonde celestial mage. She was acting weird a few days ago.

_Lucy called Gray who was sitting at the bar to come outside and meet her for a moment. Gray raised his eyebrow, wondering why the celestial mage would call him. He came outside the guild to see her blushing madly._

"_G-Gray… I give you this key," she showed Gray a yellowish-brown key. He was confused._

"_M-Me? Why?" Gray said. He stared at the key Lucy had placed in his hand. The key seemed oddly familiar to him._

_Lucy gave a wink like she usually does. "Gray, when you think the time is right, to use the key in the Heartfilia garden. Well, it might not be the Heartfilia Garden anymore, but who cares. Beside my Mother's grave, there is a box embedded in the ground. The key I just gave you matches the lock, so go there and open it."_

_Gray, still very confused about the whole ordeal, asked, "But how do I know it's the right time?" He was awkwardly playing with his hair as a reflex. They had never talked to each other in private before._

_The blond haired girl smiled sincerely and answered, "Because you will." She then turned abruptly and left the ice mage standing awkwardly in front of the guild._

Back then, Gray hadn't known what she meant. Yet he still felt worried.

All this time, Gray had always been interested in Lucy. He loved how she smiled, how she handled everything, and how the celestial mage always looked so happy. Gray admired her. But he always denied it to himself that he couldn't accept her love.

* * *

_It's okay to come back, it's okay to come back._

_I love you, I still love you, please. Please._

* * *

The rain started to fall, reflecting the sullen atmosphere.

"ARRRRRGGGGHHH! Lucy! Lucy! I—" his heart dropped as he remembered something from the moment before Lucy shielded him.

_"Gray! Move away!" The girl yelled and ran towards him. BAM! The lightning hit her across the chest, straight at her heart. She clutched at her chest in agony. But with smile, she turned her head around to Gray who was shocked and speechless._

_"Live well. A—" Gray could see tears in her eyes, "__Aishiteimasu*, Gray. Zutto aishiteru ne? Dakara*—" He saw her eyes were closing, "Dakara—Nakanaide*…."_

"I am foolish," Gray reprimanded himself as he hugged Lucy tighter. "I'm sorry, Lucy. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I should've died instead of you. I am an idiot." Gray murmured. His tears were still flowing steadily. He let the rain wash away his tears. He laid a soft and sweet kiss on her lips. His eyes stung as he felt the cold, lifeless lips against his own. He pulled back slowly, staring at Lucy's beautiful face.

Gray broke down. "Why you have to go, Lucy? You told me you loved me when it was too late! The truth is _I love you. _I love you, Lucy. But I couldn't make a move because you were always with that ash-brain. I tried to move on and looked at Juvia, but nothing changed. This is only a dream, right? You're so light… and you're sleeping in my arms… like a dream…." Gray spaced out. He didn't even realize he had stopped moving.

"You are with me right, Lucy?" Gray whispered. "YOU ARE WITH ME LUCY! YOU WILL WAKE UP AND HUG ME! YOU WILL! YOU MUST!" Gray screamed uncontrollably. At that moment, Team Natsu came out from the clinic heading towards Gray. Erza approached Gray and held him tightly while Natsu carried Lucy's dead body.

"Gray! You have to face the truth! Lucy _is _dead! You can't be like this, Gray!" exclaimed Erza. She was crying as well. "Lucy—Lucy is gone, Gray. You have to realize that!"

Gray glared at Erza. "No she's not! She's alive; she's just sleeping there! Look at her peaceful face?"

The fire dragon slayer yelled, "GRAY! You bastard! You are the main reason why she ended up like this! Lucy is—"

"Dammit! Flame brain! LUCY IS ALIVE! LUCY IS!" Gray cursed. Erza held him tightly as Natsu walked away, carrying the beautiful blonde haired girl. "No, Lucy—NOOO!"

* * *

_I think I will go crazy from missing you_

_I just want to forget, I think I will go crazy_

_Just too difficult, very difficult_

_Tears filling my eyes, obstructing the view_

_Your figure is blurry_

* * *

**A day passed after Lucy's tragic death.**

The ice mage sat in a chair glaring. Makarov was standing before him. He stared at Gray, but the ice mage looked away. He still believed that Lucy was only sleeping, and no matter what anyone said, he stuck to this idea. The preparations for her funeral were set, but Gray wouldn't believe it.

"Gray, stop being so stubborn! Don't be like this, my child." Makarov's eyes were suspiciously wet. Gazing at Gray made him feel very saddened. "Lucy—"

Gray interrupted, "NO SHE'S NOT, OLD MAN!" He yelled. All the people in the guild stared at the two. The broken hearted Juvia stared at the ice mage as well. Juvia took a step forward. She bowed, until she could see the ice mage's face clearly.

"_Why_?" She whispered. "_Why, _Gray-sama? I thought you _liked_ me. There were times that you and Lyon-sama—"

"It's an act, _Juvia. _Why _the hell _you won't understand? I'm _in love _with Lucy. But it seemed like she love Natsu, that's why I decided to distract my mind by '_having fun' _with you."

Juvia widened her eyes at his callous words. She couldn't believe it. She turned to run away, her sobs echoing behind her. Makarov crossed his hands.

He announced, "If you don't get the truth about Lucy through your head, you will miss out on attending her funeral. It takes place tomorrow, so you have until then," he said as he walked away from Gray.

Gray didn't respond. He wanted to see Lucy alive so badly that it made him act crazy. He kept asking himself, why?Why did he keep acting like this? He knew that Lucy wouldn't come back. He knew it clearly, yet he couldn't accept the truth.

The truth.

* * *

_Feeling hurt, feeling frustated_

_I tell myself there is no more love for me_

_It's time to forget, please forget_

_I make a promise to myself but you remain in my heart_

* * *

The Ice mage stood up and he trudged out the guild with a look of determination. Erza suspiciously watched him go. She decided to follow him, thinking he would most likely be planning something stupid.

She followed him to the train station. It's unexpected, one of Ur's pupils was riding train to go somewhere. _Suspicious… _the Requip mage thought. She bought a ticket for herself and hid in a small corner of the train; she didn't want Gray to find out that she was following him.

Erza stared out the window as they arrived to their destination. _I think I know this place…_Erza mumbled to herself as she tried to recollect the memory. _Heartfilia Garden… _She realized suddenly.

"Gray_…"_ she whispered.

Gray gazed around the Heartfilia Garden. He walked slowly to Layla's grave and noticed a smaller rectangular stone beside it. _That must be it. _Gray nodded to himself and walked towards the stone. He could see a keyhole and writing:

_Stand on the stone and insert the key while you're standing._

He dutifully stood on the stone and inserted the key in the keyhole. Something amazing happened. The stone moved aside and a strange light approached. Gray could see a deep hole inside the stone and something peculiar inside of it. He reached down to grab a beautiful diamond. The color of the diamond was as dark as his hair. As soon as he touched the diamond, it started to shine brightly, surprising him enough to jerk his hand back. But the diamond started to float in the air, still shining brightly. A hologram appeared, in the shape of a young girl.

Lucy.

The projector—or as Gray could tell, Lucy, smiled._ "Hey Gray! I know this time would come. Yeah. I'm—" _that Lucy swallowed hard_, "__dead_._"_

Silence followed as Gray was unable to speak.

"_But no worries, okay? Don't cry because of me, Gray. There are LOTS of thing I wanted to tell you. But first of all, I just wanna say—_Aishiteru. _I love you, Gray Fullbuster. I love you with all my heart. I know I look silly as I say this because you saw me hanging around Natsu—" _Lucy sighed, _"But I just can't concentrate when I'm with you. I always looked at you and I couldn't focus. As a result, I'm afraid that I missed out on spending quality time with you."_

Gray tried to touch her. Her voice was so flawless. But his hand passed right through the projection. He couldn't touch her.

Lucy smiled. "_Please take care our team, Levy-chan, and the others for me. I love them all. I wished I could be there to party with you guys once more. But it can't be helped, right? Hehe," _the girl grinned. How Gray missed her laughter and her smile. He missed her voice and her cute face.

"_You must be wondering why I can set up this diamond thing, right? Well the truth is, when I was on this job, I got a particular celestial spirit. He's called Leife. He is the master of life. He could tell his owner around the time they should be prepared to die, but not tell how or specifically when. So a few days after I got him, he randomly appeared and told me I'm gonna die soon. I panicked and made this projection. I was too embarrassed to say that I loved you in person, so I made this to confess to you instead. That's why I'm going to give you the key." _Lucy explained.

The ice mage held his breath, "Lucy, I…"

"_I used to imagining things about you. Like we were dating together and stuff. If we married, I wanted to name them Lacy for girl, and Ray for a boy. AH! What am I talking about! But it's impossible now, right? Never mind. By the way, I have some things inside this stone. I made a box and I put some of these diamonds inside it. Lately I record my diaries and not with 'mama' again, but with your name. You can see me talking to you and telling you about my days. But if you decided to abandon those things, I wouldn't mind. So this is not our farewell, _ne?_ And—the last thing I wanna do—_stay still."

Lucy pushed her face to Gray slowly. She touched both of Gray's cheek gently as if she was solid once more. "_I love you, Gray," _she whispered as she touched his lips with hers. Gray circled his arms around Lucy's invincible waist. She pressed her lips to Gray's. Gray could feel tears trailing down his cheeks. After several seconds, Lucy broke the kiss.

"_I'm sorry I kissed you. I'm so crazy that I kissed thin air while recording this. I'm sorry. I love you Gray…"_ Lucy faded away. Gray didn't realize his tears were littering the ground below.

"Lucy," he called her name as he knelt down. "Lucy, I wanted you_. _I wanted you so damn badly. Why did you go? Why?"

Erza came out from her hidden spot where she was watching Gray. She was crying as well and wrapped a comforting arm around his shoulder. "Gray. Let it go."

Gray's cries filled the evening red sky.

* * *

_I try not to think of you_

_But you are back in my thoughts_

_It will be alright, just few more days, then I will forget_

**_Like Ice, my heart will melt._**

* * *

_H_e touched the beautiful diamond and watched as it floated into the air. A girl showed up with a dazzling smile.

"_Hey Gray! Guess what? Natsu and I went fishing today. I was mumbling because Natsu was being so selfish, but then I saw you! Yes, you, Gray Fullbuster! You were practicing freezing the water. I think you failed at first because of the magic inside the water. It felt like Juvia's magic. At the end you succeeded, Gray! I'm so happy,"_ Lucy jumped around. _"Oh. I was planning to confess to you today, Gray. But that stupid Juvia distracted me. She was right all the time. I was her love-rival. Yes, right tense. 'Was.' _Lucy smiled sadly. _"Oh yeah, whatever. And did you know, Gray? You held my hands on the mission! I'm so _damn _happy! Look at my blushing face!" _The girl exclaimed. Gray gazed at her, noticing her cute rosy cheeks.

"_Okay bye Gray. That's all. I-" _Lucy averted her eyes. Her face reddened. "_I love you," _she whispered as her figure faded.

Mirajane called his name softly. "Gray. Come, it's time for Lucy's funeral." He nodded.

"Just a second." He stood up, packed everything Lucy gave to him, and walked outside his room.

The funeral went well. Levy was crying hard as Gajeel tried to comfort her. Asuka gave Lucy's grave a bucket of flowers. Even Makarov—he was crying. They left after the funeral. Levy didn't want to leave, but Gajeel forced her and said that Lucy needed some peace. After that, the only ones standing there were Natsu, Happy, Charle, Wendy, Erza and… Gray.

"_Ikou?" _The red haired girl smiled and walked. Natsu fisted his hands and shook his head negatively. "Natsu. Let's go." Erza said firmly. Natsu shook his head yet again.

"It's not fair, Erza! Gray—"

Erza slapped Natsu. Natsu widened his eyes in surprised. Once more, he could see tears in Erza's eyes. Erza turned her head around to Wendy. "Come on, Wendy, Charle. Let's go," she said quietly and walked away. Natsu bowed down and whispered, "rest in peace, Luce…" He turned his back and followed the others. Gray was the only one left standing there.

Gray clenched his hands. He stared at the blue sky. Tears were flowing on his cheeks. "Lucy, I know. If I choose to keep acting crazy and choose suicide, it's the same as abandoning your life. To throw my life away is like throwing your life away. I'll continue to live and be with you until the end of my life. I just can't let you go…."

* * *

_50 years later_

Sorcerer Magazine Headline

_Gray Fullbuster has passed away while protecting the Fairy Tail guild from the Tataros guild. He was one of Fairy Tail's strongest S-Class mages and known as the guy who studied spirits and beat Kaso from the Tataros guild that was known as the master of the spirits._

_Tataros (dark guild) attacked Fairy Tail Sunday Afternoon (year XXX)._

_Gray Fullbuster was known as the forever-single guy. We tried to interview some of the S-Class wizards of Fairy Tail, which are the old members of Gray's team, about why he chose to be single, but we failed. We know that it seems as though Gray Fullbuster couldn't forget Lucy Heartfilia, who died 50 years ago for an unknown reason (possibly from a mission). He might have fallen in love with her and decided to stay single for the rest of his life after her passing. He adopted two children and named them Lacy Fullbuster and Ray Fullbuster._

_He never talked too much, except his famous words:_

"_I can't let you go…"_

_According to Levy McGarden, before he passed away from the fatal wounds he had received from fighting, he said his final words:_

"_I still believe that you will come back to me…"_

Master Erza Scarlet made his grave one with Lucy Heartfilia's.

**Lucy Heartfilia and Gray Fullbuster**

**Born: July 1, X767 Born: X766**

**Death: XXX Death: XXX**

**Members of Fairy Tail guild**

**Great friends for their guild**

**Best mates for their team.**

_Wait for me, Lucy. I'll come to you…_

* * *

_I even try to forget_

_Why do I think it will be hard to stop?_

_I try to forget it_

_Like a fool, just like a fool_

* * *

**_I still believe that you will come back to me._**

* * *

**…**

**"_Aishiteimasu, Gray. Zutto aishiteru ne? Dakara—" He saw her eyes were closing, "Dakara—Nakanaide…"_**

**_It means literally "_I'm loving you, Gray. Hey I will always love you. That's why—" He saw her eyes were closing, "That's why—Don't cry…"**

**"_Ikou?" The red haired girl smiled and walked._**

**It means, 'Let's go?'**

**_Mind to review?_**


End file.
